


The many sides of Light Yagami

by PineappleandBlueberries1967



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: ? - Freeform, I'm pretty sure there's nobody but me who likes both of these things, Inspired by Sanders Sides, the movie is terrible and so is this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-03-23 10:38:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13785729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PineappleandBlueberries1967/pseuds/PineappleandBlueberries1967
Summary: Light decides he needs to have a serious conversation with himself. It does not go as planned.(Otherwise known as what happens when I bingewatch the entirety of Death Note followed by Sanders sides)On Hiatus!





	1. In which I used the words "Head" and "Ache" way too many times.

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been watching a lot of YouTube recently and when I came across the Sanders Sides I thought it was an interesting concept and I wanted to see if it would work effectively in other settings, especially on characters who have an inner dialogue or easy facial expressions or a really clear personality. I thought Light was perfect for this as in Death Note you get to see a lot of different sides to his character.

Light sighed as he collapsed on his bed, his forehead banging slightly. His head had been aching all day and he hadn't been able to stop it. It was incredibly annoying and had kept him from getting anything done. He even had to sacrifice writing in the death note as his head ached even looking at it. A raspy laugh signalled from over his shoulder and he rolled his eyes slightly. The cause of the laugh was another headache, but at least one he knew how to deal with. He rolled over, sat up and regained his composure.

"Is my pain amusing you, Ryuk?" He asked, not looking up from the floor. The laugh just got louder and Light eventually moved his eyes up to see the creature floating at the edge of his bed. A large skeletal creature stood tall and misshapen, black and brittle bones sticking out oddly. It was wearing an assortment of leather that seeed almost fused with it's skin. It's pasty face was mishaped, a blood red and crooked smile pasted eternally on it's face, sharp teeth sticking out. It's eyes were a burning yellow with blood red irises. There were spikes of bone sticking out from its shoulders and large wings were tucked towards it's body. If anyone else saw this creature they would surely be terrified, but to Light this creature was just an unfortunate bonus to the death note. A nuicance more than anything else. The creature continued laughing before finally glimpsing at Light.

"How's your head, Light?" He chuckled, leaning over the teen. Light didn't move in the slightest, just turned his head up.

"How do you think?" He responded snarkily. Instead of being offended however the death god just smiled wider. 

"There's a slight buzzing noise right at the base of your skull. It causes the sides of your ears to sting which in turn creates a dulling sensation in the centre of your forehead. The back of your eyes irritate slightly and your nerves are responding slower than usual." He stated, almost like a doctor telling their patient their diagnostic. Light frowned. He had never told Ryuk any of this, only that he had a headache. He was about to ask Ryuk how he knew that but Ryuk's chuckle cut him off.

"Let me guess, you're wondering how I knew that?" He asked, his wings shifting slightly. 

"My guess is that you're not going to just tell me." Light said, sighing. He could already see where this conversation was going. 

"No, and my guess is that you already know what I'm going to ask for." He tilted his head and streched his wings. Ryuk already knew that he was going to get what he wanted. Light sighed and put his school blazer back on. 

"How many?" He asked, already mentally counting the amount of money he had. 

"20." Ryuk said. Light looked at hm from the corner of his eye. 

"Not going to happen. 5." He bargained. He already knew exactly how many he was going to buy. 

"No way i'm telling you for just 5. 15 at least." He said, seeming concrete on his word. Light frowned. 

"10" 

"15" 

"12. I'm not going any higher." Ryuk smiled slightly. 

"13" Of course he just had to push further. Light shook his head slightly. 

"13 it is." Ryuk smirked victoriously. The last thought Light had before he left his house was that it had better be worth it. Although, knowing Ryuk and his way of expaining things, it probably wouldn't be.


	2. In which I try to make the explanation sinster and fail misery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apples are eaten, pains are explained and Light contemplates.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was originally going to have the entire story in just one chapter but I quckly realised that I ramble too much and it would probably just be easier to just split everything up. Also, you know, suspense and everything.

One incredibly mundane trip to the market later, Ryuk was splayed out on Light's bed, an apple hanging from one of his hands. Light knew that Ryuk wouldn't say anything until all the apples were gone, so he retreated into the bathroom. He straightened his brown hair a little and looked into his reflection, searching for any flaws peope may catch onto. He couldn't afford to be anything less than perfect in everyones eyes. His brown eyes still shined slightly, his suit free from any wrinkles. Smiling a little, he exited the bathroom. Ryuk was still on Light's bed, but now the apples were gone and he was staring intently at Light. Light moved to the chair at his desk and turned to face Ryuk, wincing a small bit as his head once again flaired up in pain. Almost as soon as he was facing Ryuk, the god started speaking.

"Alright first thing to set straight. That pain in your head? That isn't any ordinary headache." He started. light scoffed, he had already guessed that, how else would Ryuk know about it? Ryuk continued speaking however, uncaring. 

"The pain is a sort of... clause to the death note. It doesn't happen to everyone, only people who possess death notes for extended periods of time." He explained. Light rolled his eyes. 

"And what exactly is this clause?" He asked, wanting to cut past all of the unnescesary talking. Ryuk smiled. 

"Do you remember how I said that the death note breeds bad luck and misery? This is part of it. Basically, the more you use the death note, the more pain you'll feel, and to my knowledge, there's only one way to fix it." He said. His wings had shifted again, and he'd gotten up from Light's bed. Light turned. 

"How?" He asked. The pain in his mind was annoying at best an unmanegable at worst, he doubted he'd be able to handle it if it got worse and he needed his mind 100% clear and active at all times if he was ever going to beat L. Ryuk chucked. 

"You talk to yourself." He said. Light looked at him alost confused. He couldn't imagine that being the solution at all. 

"I... Talk to myself?" His voice was filled with scepticism.

"I'm not talking about you speaking to thin air and expecting an answer. I'm talking traits." Ryuk said. He was circling Light now like a vulture. Light ignored this. 

"I'd prefer it if you gave me a clear answer to my questions, Ryuk." Ryuk sighed and stood still. 

"You really like taking the fun out of everything, don't you?" He streched his wings. 

"Everyone on earth has traits, the basic fundementals that make up a persons personality. They're normally consistent of 3-7 different traits and unlike what everyone believes, they work seperately to each other, controlling their own parts of what makes that persons personality. The death note works against these traits, often corrupting them, which, is what causes the pain by the way. Eventually it either drives you crazy or it just makes you more bloodthirsty tha normal." He explained, an extremely bored taint in his voice. 

"That still doesn't explain how i'm supposed to interact with them." Light pointed out. Ryuk's grin wdened even further. 

"That would be me. Shinigami's have the power and bring these traits into the human world and interact with their person. It wouldn't remove these traits from you, it would just make these traits stronger and have the ability to think for themselves." Ryuk started circling Light again. 

"Unlike the eye deal, this doesn't cost anything. It is, of course extremely painful. Also, there's a chance that the process won't be undoable and you'll be stuck with your traits like that forever." Light smiled sardonically. Of course, the only solution is a risky one. On one hand he knew he wouldn't be able to fully focus when his mind was suffering and if it got worse he may even make a mistake and reveal himself as Kira. On the other hand however, removing these traits from himself could make things even more difficult and he might not be able to think at all. He was about to decline the offer, but a large spike of pain rushed through Light's head at that exact moment. His vision went slightly blurry and there was a slight ringing in his ears. That made up his mind. He couldn't allow the pain to continue any longer, who knew what would happen if this caused Kira to be discovered? He'd deal with any concequences to the traits later, but right now something had to be done. 

"Do it." Light said. Ryuk's grin overtook most of is face and his eyes glowed a bright red. 

"As you say."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to let your thoughts known in the comments, i'm still a relatively new writer so any feedback is great! Currently working on fixing any mistakes but I'm pretty blind when it comes to spelling mistakes, just as a warning.


	3. In which I spend way too long describing the traits without actually giving any characteristics other then what Light thinks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light gets to see his traits, and they're not quite what they expect

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little longer but I wanted to get all the descriptions down so I could just be like "there, done. Established."

Everything hurt. Well that was a slight understatement. His entire body was on fire. It was like he’d willingly jumped off of the top of the tallest building in the world into the shallowest pool in the world, and that pool was full of very sharp nails and burning hot fire. He could hear Ryuk laughing in the background and it was the only thing stopping him from going crazy. The pain lasted for what seemed like hours and then it suddenly stopped, coming to a screeching halt. It was so jarring that Light had to grab onto the edge of his desk to stop him from falling. He opened his eyes hesitantly to see that he was already lying on the floor and his hand was instead wrapped around the leg of his desk. The world was still blurry, and he could only vaguely make out the shape of Ryuk. He closed his eyes again and pushed himself up from the floor. He expected some kind of burning sensation but to his surprise nothing happened. It was almost like the pain had never happened.

Light shook away any memories of the pain and got to his feet. He smoothed out his suit, straightened his hair and tie, and stretched out his arms. He could hear Ryuk chuckling from his bed, and he reluctantly opened his eyes. He wasn’t sure what he expected to see when he opened his eyes, but 5 perfect copies of himself certainly wasn’t it. They were all placed in different spots of the room and even though they looked exactly like him he could see differences in them. It was an incredibly strange sight. Light decided that instead of trying to process everything at once it would be easier to go from trait to trait, dissect them, and figure out what parts of himself they represented.

First, he focused in on the window. There was on of them stood next to the curtains. It was playing with the tassel which Light used to bind the curtains together. Its hair was messy, which looked very strange seeing as he always kept his hair looking the best he could. It had taken off the suit jacket and tie, and the shirt appeared to be made of a softer material and was a light blue. It wore a wide smile, and Light couldn’t tell if it was a manic grin or an innocent one. It seemed to change periodically and the being went from bouncing around and humming to standing strangely and chuckling. It noticed light looking at him and gave Light a friendly wave. Light cautiously offered one back. Light guessed that this might be his inner child, or possibly madness based on the way it acted. He turned attention to the next trait.

Sat on the edge of his bed was another one. Its back was pressed against the walls and its legs were tucked close to its body. It was looking around the room frantically, its eyes never staying on one spot for too long. When it noticed light staring at it, it shifted its body into a more protective stance. Its hair was straight but lightly greasy, as if it hadn’t watched in weeks and there were dark circles under its eyes. It was wearing a completely different outfit, a black pair of slacks and a long sleeved dark purple t-shirt. It was whispering to itself and kept looking towards Light’s door like one would look at a possible escape route. Light rolled his eyes. This was obviously his sense of paranoia, although very heightened. He turned over to the wall near the door.

The third trait looked so ridiculous that light found himself struggling not to laugh. It was stood perfectly, its arms swaying gently as it moved them through his hair, which sat flat. Light would have been impressed, but the way he was dressed cancelled out anything else. It was wearing a white robe, falling right above its feet, which were bare. There was a single red sash draped over the shoulder which tied the thing together. In its left hand was a long golden sceptre, but instead of a jewel on the top there was a small portrayal of the globe. There was also a golden crown on its head, which was small and thing, along with it being slightly jagged. The trait didn’t seem at al bothered by Light’s assessments, its eyes were fixed on the globe, watching it spin. Light wondered if he could just pretend that this part of himself existed. In all honestly, so far none of these traits looked anything like what Light would imagine his personality to be. He had no idea what this trait could be.

Light turned to his bookshelf. The fourth trait looked promising. It was stood up straight, its arms crossed over its stomach and its head high. It was looking at the other traits with a sense of disbelief, but when it noticed life its eyes stilled and he stood up more. Keeping its composure. Its hair was perfect and it looked almost identical to light. The only changing factors were that it wasn’t wearing a cardigan, its shirt was a dark white and its tie was a dark blue instead of red. Light could see the intelligence behind its eyes and recognised its stance easily. This one seemed like the trait most similar to light. It was obviously his analytical thinking, and Light was very pleased to see it behaving normally.

Lights sense of hope that maybe these traits wouldn’t be so bad quickly depleted when he looked at the last trait. It was sat on Light’s desk chair, which was swivelled around to face him. The traits legs were up on Light’s bed, and his entire posture spelled of calmness. But there was something under it. Its eyes were on lights the whole time, calculating and cold. It wore an opposite of Light’s outfit, a deep black T-Shirt and Jeans, A grey jacket, and a yellow tie that was loosened to the point where it should be falling apart. Its grin was charming and deadly, its eyes spoke of mischief and chaos. Even its hair seemed to mean something, it was a mess, sticking out every which way, but it almost seemed like every strand had been placed there on purpose. The trait reminded Light of himself in many ways, and he guessed that it might be his Sadism, or his inner Kira.

Ryuk chuckled meaningfully. He pointed to the trait by the window and Light followed his movements. 

“Emotion.” He said. Light gave a brief thought as to what it meant if his emotions were portrayed like this, like a child who had yet to learn complex emotion, but shut that train of thought down. Ryuk then turned to the trait on the bed, smiling widely. 

“Paranoia.” Light smirked at that one, he had guessed that was the trait was. It was exactly how he expected the embodiment of paranoia to act. At least one of them could be predictable. Light would need that. Ryuk turned to the trait near the bookshelf.

“Logic.” Light smiled again. Exactly what he’d hope his critical thinking to be like. Ryuk turned to the trait near the door next. Light was curious to see what this trait would be. 

“Innovation.” Light was confused for a second before he realised what that meant. That trait was his creativity. All of the goals Light hoped to achieve. At least that explains the outfit. That is something a god would wear. Ryuk turned to the last trait, at his desk. Light already knew that this trait was Sadism. It was the only way to explain the way he acted, and Light knew that it was a part of him. The part that was able to kill to get what he wanted. Ryuk chucked heavily as if hearing Lights thoughts. 

“Morality.” He said. Light turned to Ryuk.

"That makes no sense! How can that be my morality? My morality is just and fair. Nothing like what this trait acts like." Light protested.

Ryuk ignored him. 

“Let’s begin, shall we?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think I the comments, any complaints are welcome! 
> 
> Also try and guess which trait is inspired by which side, you get extra points if you get them all right :)


	4. In which literally nothing happens except for a little more character description and some actual dialogue!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The talking begins, almost too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been over a week but I kinda forgot tbh, I realised that I have quite a few spelling mistakes, but I plan on writing it all up and then I'll go back and fix anything I need to!

Light looked around the room. The traits were all looking back at him expectedly, but he didn't know why. Ryuk chuckled from the ceiling. 

“You have to give them your permission to talk.” He said. Light looked up towards the Shinigami. 

“What? Why? How does that make any sense?” Ryuk shrugged in response. Light sighed and shook his head slightly. 

“You can talk.” He said. Immediately the room as filled with voices, there was excited babble coming from the emotion trait, the one on the bed seemed to be asking questions, the logical one was merely stating facts, and the innovative one was ranting about something. The only one that wasn't speaking was his so called “morality” who was sat in the chair at his desk, unmoving.

“I said you can talk, not shout my ears off. I can’t hear any of you if you all talk at the same time like that.” Light said, calm and composed as always. Even though he didn't raise his voice all the traits seemed to hear him and they all went quiet. 

“Oh my gosh, sorry! I didn't know I was hurting you! Are you OK?” Emotion apologised, looking at Light worriedly. Light stared at it unbelieving. This was ridiculous, Light didn't act like this and he certainly didn't feel like this either. 

“I wasn't the one talking loudly. I think you’ll find that the blame belongs to the rest of the traits.” Logic rationalised. Innovation made a loud protest at that, but Logic just turned to Light as if it was proving its point. 

“Well I’m not sorry at all! I should be listened to and I feel offended that you weren't paying attention to me!” Innovation complained, its hands flaring out wildly. Light wondered why his innovation acted like this. Yes, Light wanted to become a god, but he didn't act like this. Paranoia offered a quiet sorry, and then lowered its head. Morality was still quiet and light desperately wanted to ask it why it acted like that and if it was really his Morality.

“Alright.” Ryuk said, stretching his wings. All of the traits turned to him and Light watched their reactions. Emotions didn’t seemed fazed at all, smiling happily up at the death god, Logic was staring at it with a sense of disbelief, Innovation simply rolled its eyes at Ryuk as if it was above the God. Paranoia was avoiding looking at Ryuk, but seemed to be hyper aware of his existence. Morality was still staring at light, unblinking.

"You ask questions, they answer the questions, you figure out what's wrong, they disappear. Simple." Ryuk spoke, his tone was one of amusement however. 

"I should probably let you know, nobody has ever managed to figure out what the problem is." He said, and chuckled. Great, yet another catch. Light wondered how many other problems would arise. He didn't bother asking though, Ryuk would never tell him. Light sighed and turned towards the traits. 

"Alright, first of all, a few rules."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, hope you enjoyed! Feel free to leave comments below on what you liked/didn't like


	5. In which i abuse my author powers to make Light shut up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rules are left unspoken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Iiit's been a while. Again. I had the chapter, but i just couldn't be bothered to post it. sorry!

Before Light had the chance to talk again, Morality snapped its fingers, and light suddenly found his hand covering his mouth. He hadn’t done that and he couldn’t pull it away. What was happening? Morality didn’t speak. After a minute, Light regained control of his arm, and lowered it from his mouth. The other traits were all looking at Morality with a layer of fear.

“What the hell was that?” He asked Ryuk, who had also gone silent. Ryuk smiled.

“No idea, I’ve never seen a trait take over the host before.” He said, tilting is head at Morality.

“How interesting.”

“Um, excuse me? Mr. Death God?” Light shook his head. Did he hear that right? He turned to emotion who was stood with his hand up in the air, waving it around. Ryuk saw this and started laughing.

“Hehe, Mr. Death God. I like that, light, are you going to start calling me Mr. Death God too?” He mocked. Light put a hand over his face.

“What is it?” Ryuk asked the trait, who was smiling obliviously. In fact, it seemed to grow under what Ryuk had said. It really did act just like a child.

“If it’s alright, could you please refer to us as sides instead of traits? It’s a little rude.” Emotion said, looking up at Ryuk. Ryuk chuckled a little.

“Sure, and in exchange, how about you call me Ryuk? Mr. Death God sound too… human for my tastes.” He smiled. Light couldn’t tell if Ryuk was being serious or not. Emotion squealed in delight.

“Thank you Ryuk!” it said, bouncing happily.

“If I could hug you, I would!” it said gratefully. If outstretched its arms anyway and moved forward, only to bounce off of a non-existent wall. Emotion laughed and stepped back again "

Yep, can't do that" At this point, all of the traits were looking at emotion, even morality. Light decided to ignore emotion for now and get back on track.

"As I was saying before, I have a few rules that I-" Light was cut off by his own arm again. Morality was glaring at him. The traits kept talking this time, loudly. Light winced. What if someone heard them? The only one that seemed to grasp that was paranoia, who had stayed silent. It could've told the other traits to be quiet, but it didn't. Light couldn't decide if he praised the trait for staying quiet or hated the trait for not reigning in the others. Light gained control of his arm.

"Be quiet!" He hissed, looking at the other traits tiredly.

"My family could hear, and they you'd be discovered." He said. Everyone went quiet again. Light sighed.

"Thank you." He said. Light shifted his eyes towards Morality slightly. He subtly put his arms behind his back and crossed them.

"There are still some rules that-" His arm once again went to cover his mouth. Light glared at Morality. Morality smirked at light, his arms crossed over his chest. He was sat up straight and his eyes were locked onto lights. The other traits had gone silent.

"I'm not listening to your rules, and neither is anyone else. It's pointless anyway. You can’t control us." Morality spoke. His voice was sharp and mocking, his eyes were laughing.

"I control you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments below! Subscribe for more videos- no wait that's youtube...


	6. In which this chapter is a little longer than normal bc i couldn't find a good point to stop it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morality is in charge now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kind of long, but I just couldn't stop writing! I hope ya'll enjoy!

The room darkened and flickered. Ryuk’s laughter echoed throughout the room. The sides faded in and out of existence. And then there was a snapping noise and everything was back to normal, except there was another trait in the room. Only this one didn’t look like Light at all. It looked exactly like L. Morality was splayed out on the floor, and the new trait was crouched in Light’s chair, hunched over, its knees up to its chest and its head cocked to the side.

“What the actual-“

“LANGUAGE!” Emotion interrupted loudly, crossing its arms over in a disgruntled manor. The newest trait smiled slightly at Morality.

“Thank you, Castin.” The newest trait spoke. Emotion beamed back at the new trait. Light was brimming with questions.

“What trait are you? Why do you look like L? Who’s Castin? What happened to Morality? What’s going on?” Light hated not knowing what was happening. He had thought that all of the traits were there, he hadn’t expected something like this to happen. The newest trait turned to light and smiled mysteriously.

“You do not need to know what trait I am. It’s not important. However, for the sake of names, you may refer to me as L. Speaking of which, I do not know why I look like L. It is your mind, after all. You were the one that created me, and I am as much of a part as you as everyone else. Castin is the true name of Emotion. Before you ask, yes, all of the sides have real names, and no, I am not going to tell you. Morality was attempting to possess you by taking over the sides. I saw this, and stopped him from doing any real harm to any of them. It’s a shame that I had to save you in the process. As for what’s going on? Well, surely you can figure that out yourself.”

Everyone had gone silent. Light stared at the trait, as if trying to deduct its meaning. He couldn’t concentrate however. He didn’t know what it was, but something in him was convincing him not to pry. Light turned away from the trait and looked at Ryuk, who was looking particularly interested in the most recent development. He noticed light staring at him.

“What?” He asked, twitching slightly in annoyance.

“What is it?” Light asked. Ryuk tilted his head and turned towards L. He looked the trait up and down and then turned back to Light.

“No idea.”

“What do you mean, no idea?” Light asked.

“He means that he can’t tell what trait I am. I blocked anyone from seeing so in case you tried something like this.” L answered for Ryuk. It had its thumb in its mouth and was smiling slightly in victory. Light was disgusted. The way it talked, the way it sat, even the way it interacted with Light, it was exactly like L. How could Light create something like this? Some sort of mockery of the detective in his mind? And what exactly was it? Light knew it had to represent something, but if not even Ryuk knew, and the trait wouldn’t tell him, then how was he supposed to figure it out? Light sighed in frustration. Even in his own mind he wasn’t free of L. Emotion waved its hand around, grabbing lights attention.

“You had some rules to explain?” It asked. Morality looked up from the floor, where it was sat slumped over. It snapped its fingers and Light tensed but nothing happened. L smiled from the chair. “Don’t worry, he won’t be interrupting you anymore. Please, continue.” L said, waving at light to continue. Light stared at L for a second before turning away.

“All right… first of all…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know thoughts in the comments! Any pacing issues? Tell me! Pesky spelling problems? I want to know! Words of praise? Hit me up!


	7. wel[

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm that guy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, it's come to this

Do you ever get really inspired to do something and become super dedicated to that thing but then literally forget all about that thing?

Yeah...

I'll probably get back to this at some point.

Maybe. I'm notoriously known for never freaking finishing things.

Oops.

Stay in touch- but don't have too much hope.

Oh, yeah and sorry about the wait for nothing :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments, I'm always looking for feedback! They'll be a lot of spelling mistakes and I'm currently working on the layout, but apart from that, no major issues.


End file.
